Tony Robbins: STOP Wasting Your LIFE! (Change Everything in Just 90 DAYS)

Evan Carmichael:

He’s an American motivational speaker, personal finance instructor, and self-help author. He became well known from his infomercials and self-help books. In 2013, Forbes estimated his net worth at 480 million dollars. He’s Tony Robbins, and here are his Top Ten Rules For Success.

Tony Robbins:

Ultimately, if you’re going to have lasting change in anything, you’re really talking about just raising your standards. I mean, I always tell people; if you want to know how to change your life, I’ll give it to you in three words, boring as it sounds, “raise your standards.” Now, what does that mean, corny as it sounds, “raise your standards”? “Well, thank you for the breakthrough thought, Tony. I’m glad I wasted my time watching this little email with you.”

Think about it. Lasting change is different than a goal. You don’t always get your goals, but you always get your standards. Maybe what’ll help you is to think about it this way. I try to explain standards to people with a different set of words. Think of it as everybody in life gets their “musts.” They don’t get their “shoulds.”

Think about it. Most people have a list of “shoulds”; don’t they? Don’t you have a list of “shoulds,” things you should do, you should follow through on? “I should lose some weight.” “I should work out more.” “I should make more calls.” “I should respond more rapidly to my email,” whatever. “I should get into the office earlier.” “I should be more confident.” Whatever your “should” list, people love to have their “should” list be met, but it’s like New Year’s resolutions. If it does, it’s really exciting. If it doesn’t, which is most of the time, it’s a little disappointing, but you kind of know it’s not going to happen.

When you decide something is a “must” for you, an absolute “must,” when you cut off any possible… you say, “I’m going to find a way, or I’m going to make the way.” Human beings, when they resolve things, when they make a real resolution inside themselves, which is they raise the standard and they make it a “must,” they find the way. Think about it in your own life.

Tony Robbins (continued):

Haven’t you had some area of your life where you raised your standard, and your life has never been the same? Maybe, at one time in your life, you smoked cigarettes. Or you did something, and you did it for years. You kept trying to change it, trying to change it and kept telling yourself, “I should.” Then, one day, something happened. Something just clicked you over. Something took you over that tipping point, and inside yourself, you said, “No more.” That was a very, very different experience; wasn’t it? Something inside of you shifted.

What was a “should” became a “must,” and you’ve never gone back. Is there an area like that in your life that you can think of? Again, did you ever smoke cigarettes? Did you ever eat a certain way, drink a certain form of alcohol and then finally say, “No more,” and you just don’t go back?

Notice this; it doesn’t really take any willpower, anymore, because somewhere, when we make this click, when we make something a “must,” we attach ourselves to it. It becomes part of our identity.

One thing I’ve learned, in the last, gosh, 33 years of work on people from, now, over 100 countries, four million people, is human beings absolutely follow through on who they believe they are. If you said to me, “Well, I’m really going to work hard to stop smoking, but I’ve been a smoker my whole life. I am a smoker,” I know your days are numbered. You’re going to be back smoking cigarettes, again, because we all act consistent with who we believe we are.

I tell people the strongest force in the whole human personality is this need to stay consistent with how we define ourselves. If you define yourself as somebody who is really conservative, you’re not going to be crazy and act nuts, unless you’re really drunk or something. Then you can say it’s the alcohol, when it’s really just you finally getting permission to be yourself. The alcohol is your excuse. If you’re a really crazy person, you act crazy, outrageous, playful. You don’t act conservative because it’s not who you are.

Very often people say, “Well, I can’t do that. I’m not that kind of person.” I always say to people, “Really? When did you define yourself? I mean, really, how many years ago did you come up with what you could and couldn’t do in your life? How many years ago?” Most people, if they really look at how they’re living their life today, it’s based on a set of standards, a set of beliefs that they made choices about 10, 20, 30 or more years ago.

Very often, we made decisions in our youth, or very young, about what to believe, about what we were capable of, about who we are as a person, and that becomes the glass ceiling, if you will, that controls us. There is a corny metaphor, but it’s true. I remember, one time, I was with my family at the circus. There was a person there, and they had this big, giant elephant. You look at this elephant. They take this little rope, put it around the elephant’s neck, and they drive this stake into the ground. I mean, you look at this, and you know that elephant could rip down the entire tent with almost no effort. Yet, the elephant doesn’t struggle, doesn’t try. Why? Because the elephant’s conditioned.

They could take that elephant and condition the elephant when it’s a baby elephant. That’s how they train them. When it’s a little baby elephant and it doesn’t have the power, yet, they put a big rope around it, and they drive this huge stake in the ground. The elephant fights and fights and fights. One day, finally, that elephant decides, “I’m not capable of pulling this out.” Once that becomes the definition of an identity of anyone – an elephant, in this case – they don’t even try, anymore. “It’s just who I am. That’s how it is. That’s just the way it is in my life.”

I’d like to ask you to take a look at any place you’ve got a limitation and ask yourself, “When did I decide to accept that limitation?” You may not even see it as a limitation. You might see it as, just, “That’s who I am.” So often, in our lives, we’ve adapted to be a certain way, so that we don’t fail or so that people will like us or respect us. It’s not necessarily who we are. Joy comes when you’re spontaneous. It’s really hard to be truly happy when you’re not being yourself, and most of us have no clue who we are. A big part of my work – if you’ve ever been to an event, you know – is to get people to do things spontaneously, without thinking, because that’s when the real you shows up. That’s when the energy comes alive. When you do that, when you start to connect your true nature, suddenly, there’s energy available for you to set a higher standard for what you want in your life. That’s what this is really all about. When I talk about “standards” or I talk about “shoulds” versus “musts,” think about your own life. I know there have been areas in your life where, at some point in time, you just shifted.

Tony Robbins (continued):

level of action. If you lock in on a standard, you’ll find the way. Most of us, though, don’t have a high standard for ourselves. We don’t have a standard for what we want to achieve, for the kind of energy we want to have, for the kind of fitness or body we want to have, for the level of impact we want to make. Because, if we did, we would be taking massive action consistently. We’d be finding the way.

If your goal is to lose 10 pounds, and that’s your identity, that’s one thing. If your identity is “I’m an athlete,” it’s a different standard. “I’m an athlete. This is what I do. This is who I am. This is how I live.” Now, if you’ve ever heard me talk about wealth, I’ve always said, “You want to figure out not just how to make a living. You want to figure out how to design a life.” See, when you’re just making a living, it’s kind of like, “It’s about me. It’s about me paying my bills.” It’s very different than, “I’m designing a life. I’m designing a life for impact. I’m designing a life for quality.” I remember, one time, I was out to dinner with my son and his best friend, and his best friend’s dad. His best friend’s dad’s name was Lloyd Conant. Lloyd was the publisher of the Nightingale-Conant tapes. Earl Nightingale, who was this incredible human being, would always say, “You don’t get in life what you want. You get in life what you are.” That’s what’s true. Whatever standard you’ve got, you’re going to live, even though it doesn’t take any more willpower to have a higher standard, we think it does. It’s just decision. It’s a moment where you decide, “This is who I am. This is what I’m about.” If you lock in on it and you’re not achieving your goals, I guarantee you, you’re not living your standards.

Think about your body, again. You’re not overweight because you have goals to be overweight. You’re overweight because that’s what your standard is. You live what you believe. Maybe your standard has been, “It’s all about me.” What if your standard was, “It’s all about me being healthy, so I can help others. It’s all about me having an abundance of energy and strength, so I can contribute.” You might think, “Well, that’s really egotistical.” No, that’s life. Life is energy. If you don’t have the energy, nothing gets done.

If you want to take the island, you’ve got to burn the boats. I’m saying, burn the boats to your old life. Burn the boats to who you’ve been, to your old identity. Be willing to let that identity go. Who you are today is not who you can be. You decide who you are by what you decide to become, by your standards, your identity.

Tony Robbins (continued):

line is, if you’re going to run a business, one of the most important decisions is you’ve got to start thinking about, “What’s my exit strategy? How do I make this business of value?” Even if you never sell it, if you never plan to, you want to make it of value. It’s kind of like, “Why do I want to make myself better? I don’t plan on selling me.” You want to do it because that’s how you really succeed. Again, you’ve got to separate the vehicle from the outcome. The vehicle, maybe, is a business you’re going to sell. The vehicle might be the body you’re going to change. The vehicle might be the relationship you’re going to enhance, but the ultimate outcome is what you want to create. If you think through the vehicle, you’re not going to get there. You’ve got to think through the outcome.

I have a dear friend, Peter Guber. Peter is a pretty remarkable man. Peter is the chairman of Sony Entertainment, Columbia Pictures, and he’s also one of the owners of the Los Angeles Dodgers. Peter is also a producer of many movies. He produced “Rain Man,” “Batman,” “Color Purple,” “Midnight Express,” “Gorillas in the Mist,” “Flashdance,” all these great movies. You might say, “What is it that Peter Guber knows?” You can’t really say that he knows the movie business because he’s had big successes and major failures. What he knows is not the vehicle. What he knows is the outcome. Peter says, “I don’t make movies. I make emotions.” He looks at a script. He doesn’t just look at the script and say, “Is this going to be a success? Is this going to make money?” He says, “How can I make this movie something that will really affect people emotionally? How can I affect them emotionally?” That’s his outcome. The emotion is what gives people the experience, and if they have the experience, they’ll pay anything. That’s why you’ve seen some movies that you’ve paid to see, and you were hugely disappointed by it, but you went and told everybody else to see it, and they went to see it. Why? Because you want them to feel the pain you felt. Right? It’s like the worst restaurant in town. People will go to a restaurant that has terrible food, terrible service, just so they can tell their friends how bad it was. You laugh, but it’s true, isn’t it? It’s because it was an emotional experience. The restaurant did not meet the outcome, but it was an emotional experience. What we have to look at is not just the vehicle, but the outcome. You’ve got to get yourself beyond what other people think. One of the ways you can do it is by associating with people who are playing the same game you’re playing, who are ahead of you. You can’t learn from people if you think you already know everything. I’ve been really blessed. I’ve had a chance to meet a lot of amazing people, some of the most successful people in the world, in multiple industries, and I can tell you that they have a lot in common. They have unique talents, unique skills, unique capabilities, but they think very much alike. If you’re not where you want to be, if you’re not living the quality of life that you want to be living, if it’s not your business that’s where you want it to be, it’s not your body, it’s not your relationships – the only thing that’s missing is the right psychology. That’s it. How do you change your psychology? The way you do it is to model someone who’s already produced the result you want. You figure out what they do, and you do the same thing, and you get a similar result. That sounds too simple to work. Let me show you how simple it is. How many of you, in this room, can swim? Raise your hand, if you can swim. Keep your hand up. Look around. If you look around, almost everyone can swim. If you can swim, it’s because you modeled somebody. Somebody jumped in the pool, somebody threw you in the water, and you saw them swim, or you went to a class, or you saw a movie, or you saw something, and you said, “I can do that.” You just made a decision, “I can do that,” and you got in the water, and you floundered a little bit, and you learned how to swim. Swimming, for most people, is a little like learning to drive a car. You don’t know how to do it; you’re scared to death. You have no ability. You get behind the wheel of a car, you’re scared to death. You’re gripping the wheel so hard, your knuckles are white, but you learn to drive a car because it’s a must. Swimming, for most people, is a little like learning to drive a car. You don’t know how to do it; you’re scared to death. You have no ability. You get behind the wheel of a car, you’re scared to death. You’re gripping the wheel so hard, your knuckles are white, but you learn to drive a car because it’s a must. Most of the things you’ve learned in your life, you’ve learned because it was a must, not a should. If you want to learn to swim, you don’t say, “Well, I should swim.” If you don’t swim, it’s not because you “should” swim; it’s because you “must” swim. If your life depends on it, you’ll swim. If you don’t swim, it’s because there’s some other psychological issue that’s going on,

and you’d better look at it and take care of it. Swimming, for most people, is like a bicycle. You never forget how to swim, once you know how to swim. It’s not a should; it’s a must. The truth of the matter is, most of you, in this room, have a very successful psychology. If you’re in this room, it’s because you’ve done something to take control of your own psychology, your own life. Most of you don’t have a business problem. You have a psychology problem. It’s a psychology of deciding what really matters, of deciding what you’re going to focus on, of deciding what you’re going to do right now. Some of you are really clear that your business is to make your customers love you, to give them more than they expect, to make them excited, to take care of them, and if you can figure out how to meet their needs, you’re going to meet yours, as well. Some of you have business strategies that are all about “How do I make a sale?” There’s a big difference between those two, and you know which one’s successful in today’s world. It’s the one that really meets needs. I believe life is really about living rich. I don’t mean just money. I mean emotionally, psychologically, physically, spiritually, with your relationships, with your time, with your use of resources. I don’t believe in just managing your time. I believe in mastering your time. How many of you, in this room, can think of a time when you got so much more done in a short amount of time, when you were totally focused on what mattered most, and you got two weeks of work done in a day? How many have done this before? That’s what a seminar does for you. That’s what happens when you bring your team here. It’s a few days of work, and you get a year’s worth of stuff done. It’s like lighting a fire under it, and you can sustain it if you focus on it. The question isn’t how do you get yourself to do it. The question is how do you get yourself to want to do it, to fall in love with it, to be excited about it, to feel it’s a “must.” The answer is: if you don’t, you’re going to feel the pain of not changing, and the only way you’ll change is if you link massive pain to not changing. Change is never a matter of ability. It’s always a matter of motivation. I’ll tell you this: I’ve been around some of the wealthiest people in the world, some of the most successful people in the world, and I can tell you, their psychology is a psychology of success, and they model each other. They learn from each other. They learn from other people. They learn from the people they serve. They learn from other industries. They’re always looking for what they can do. They’re also not just looking to be the best in the world; they’re looking to be the best for the world. If you want to be rich, really rich, the secret is learn to add more value than anybody else. The secret is, if you think you’re in the “marketing business” or the “sales business,” you’re in the “business of adding value.” When you add more value to people’s lives, you will get wealthy. I don’t care what the economy is. I don’t care what the marketplace is. When you add more value than anybody else, you will never worry about the economy again. It doesn’t matter what happens; you will never worry again because people pay for value, and they always will. What are the areas of your life that are most important to you, and what are you going to do to make sure that you live them every single day?

Lack of Resources

Whenever people fail to achieve their goals, 99.9% of the time, you ask them why and they’ll tell you it’s because of a lack of resources. That’s what all these things are. “I didn’t have the support,” right? “I didn’t have the money.” “We didn’t have the time.” “We didn’t have this.” “We didn’t have that.” There is a resource that people believe is missing, and that resource belief structure then keeps people from ever being able to really lead because what leaders do is they find a way to maximize whatever resources they have, as little as they may be. They don’t believe in limited resources.

Sam Walton’s Example

I’ll give you an example. Let’s take a business example, to start with. In 1974, a guy named Sam Walton had built his little company up. He came up with an idea. He started with $20,000 in, I think, 1962, if I remember right. By 1974, within 12 years, he had 78 stores, and you know how he did it? In the middle of the night, he’d drive across the border, and he’d go and study other people’s stores. He’d buy everything the cheapest he could, in the middle of the night. He’d go to other people’s stores. Whatever was working, he figured out. Success leaves clues. He came back and did it in his store. Whatever was working in any store, in any competitor, anywhere he could do it, he did it. He figured out how to maximize the little resources he had, his 20,000; built 78 stores. If you read any of the people following him – the company had gone public in that year – they’re all saying, “This is it. He’s maximized his resources.” He only had so much money. There are only so many cities that are going to appeal to this “discounting” mentality; right? This is it. This is all he can do, and the word on Wall Street was “sell.”

The Power of Resourcefulness

Now, what’s interesting is, at that time, you look at Sears and Kmart, and they were gargantuan companies, weren’t they; 20, 30, 40, 50 times, 100 times his size or more, probably? At that time, they were the leaders, and they knew what was going to happen. Did things change; yes or no? Did he suddenly get mass amounts of capital? No. Here’s what they didn’t understand? Sam Walton, now, or the Walton organization, Walmart, is the most successful retailing operation on Earth. When you talk about Bill Gates being the richest man in the world, that’s only true because Sam’s fortune is divided amongst a bunch of different family members. You put them together, they dwarf Bill Gates. Sam Walton did this. How did he do it? What people underestimated is that this guy could go to 4,400 stores, do 250 billion. Where is Kmart today? They’ve been shrinking. All of them have been shrinking, and he is the dominant force on Earth.

Resourcefulness is Key

Here’s the thing he understood; resources are interesting, but the ultimate resources are the feelings of emotion that make you resourceful. Think of it this way; resourcefulness is the ultimate resource. What do I mean? What are the emotions that make all this possible? What’s the fuel that takes an idea from being in your head, where you, intellectually, know what to do? How many have had an idea, for example, it was a great idea; you’re excited about it, and then you didn’t do anything? Then, one day, there you saw it, on the shelf. You saw it somewhere. Someone stole your idea. How many have had this happen? Say “Aye”? [audience says “aye”] The only difference between you and that person was not that they had more resources. They were more resourceful.

Success and Failure

Success and failure are not giant events. They don’t just show up. You don’t just suddenly become successful or suddenly have this cataclysmic event that makes you fail. It may look that way, but failure comes from all the little things. It’s failure to make the call. It’s failure to check the books. It’s failure to say “I’m sorry.” It’s failure to push yourself to do things, physically, that you don’t want to do. All those little failures, day after day, come together until, one day, some cataclysmic event happens, and you blame that. That event happened because you missed all the little stuff. Do you agree with me?

The Nature of Success

Success, by the way, is not some overnight event. It’s all these little things. Success is having a vision. Success is making it compelling. Success is really seeing it and feeling it, every day, with strong enough reasons. Success is feeling the sense that “I’m here to grow, and I’m here to give something to the world, more than just myself.” All the little stuff, that’s where success comes from. In business, it comes from delivering more than anybody could imagine. All those little things add up, and people go, “Wow. That’s who I want to do business with.” It’s true in any area of your life.

The Importance of Leverage

Leverage is critical. You know how I get so much done? Because I don’t just get it done. I know the outcome. I know the purpose, and I look for leverage. Leverage is different than delegation. What’s the problem with delegation? Delegation is you have all that needs to be done, so you give it to someone else. You tell them what needs to be done, and when they don’t do it, you’re pissed off. Leverage says, “I can move the biggest boulder in the world, with a little bit of effort. I have something I can do it with, but I’m still part of it.” Leverage is, if I’m going to leverage something here with Tom, I’m going to make sure Tom understands the what? The outcome. I want to make sure Tom understands the…? The purpose, the why and the action. I might say to Tom, “If you can get this done without this action or better action, go for it, baby, and I want to talk to you on this date.”

Leverage and Time Management

We have to promise that we’re going to check in before it’s needed, so there are no surprises. If you’re having problems, Tom, come back to me because we’re partners on this.” That, I call “leverage.” You know what I do when I have no time? There is time. I just have to leverage it. You know what I’m saying? You say, “I have no one to leverage it, too.” Shane, over here, right? I have all the stuff he wants to do; can’t leverage it. Shane’s answer was to hire somebody. Then he thinks about what it’s going to take, and goes, “$125,000, I can’t do that now.” He’s getting caught up in one way to get the outcome. Leverage. He goes through his list, and goes, “What if I go someone to do 20% of this stuff? I could spend 20 grand to get that much freedom. I could pay for it times 10.” Hmm. If I’m really productive, my productivity should enhance the world. Not only in my clients and customers; but it should provide jobs for other people. If there’s anything you hate to do, it’s because you’re either ineffective at it or you don’t think it’s very important, but it is urgent. You need to hire somebody for those things, and ideally, somebody who loves that job. You’re never going to grow when your time is eaten up for activities that aren’t that important. Activity without high levels of purpose is the drain of your fortune. Do it now. If you can’t get it all now, do a part of it now.

The Power of Leverage

Leverage is power. Leverage is ultimate power. Here’s what I’ve created for my life, and anyone I know has succeeded. I’m a 17-year-old kid from Mezuzah, California, with no real education, other than self-education; with no background; with parents that did their best, all of them; with no money. I did one thing. I love people, and I had an enormous impact made upon myself. I sculpted my mind and my emotions to get me to do whatever it would take to achieve and to contribute, but to do that, I did it by using my body and changing my focus. I did it by putting myself in a peak physiology and using what I called “incantations.” Can you train yourself to believe something; yes or no? [audience says “yes”] Absolutely. How many of you ever made the fatal mistake of going to Disneyland or Disney World, and while you’re there, made the fatal mistake of going to a ride called It’s a Small World After All? [laughter] What happens for about a week after you’re out of that damn place? You’re still singing this thing in your head, in 24 languages; right? Well, let me tell you something. How many of you have things, when you want to go achieve them, and this part of your voice goes, “It’s not going to happen” or “Forget it”? How many have a voice that sometimes interrupts that good pattern? Say “Aye.” [audience says “aye”] What you want to do is train a new one. Starting when I was 17, I started doing incantations, not affirmations. Affirmation, you go, “I’m happy. I’m happy. I’m happy.” What’s the problem? You haven’t changed your what? Your what? Physiology. If you don’t change your physiology, you won’t get anything. An incantation is not only you speak it, but you embody what you’re saying with all the intensity you can. You do it with another repetition so that it sticks in your head. Like It’s a Small World Now, the conversation in your head is always the same, and it gives you what you want. Use your body and your voice. Seventeen years ago, I started doing things. I was working for Jim Rohn, the speaker, and I was 17 years old. I had long hair; minestrone soup acne on my face. I was trying to call on Bear Stearns-type of people and convince them why they should go to this man’s seminar and be more successful. I was driving a 1968 Volkswagen that I had earned at $40 a week, as a janitor. The only way I did it was to park far from the building and then go in. I loved people, and I believed. When I put myself in state, I was able to influence people that were far more successful than I was at the time. I will do something that I still do backstage and I’ve done for 23 years because I don’t hope I’m going to be in good state. I demand it, so I do an incantation. Using my whole body, I’d say, “I now command my subconscious mind to direct me in helping.”

The Power of Certainty

as many people as possible today, to better their lives, by giving me the strength, the emotion, the persuasion, the humor, the brevity, whatever it takes to show these people and get these people to change their lives now.” I would that, literally, driving in my Volkswagen to a meeting, in LA, on a freeway for 40 minutes. People would look. I’m screaming at the top of my lungs, and they’re going, “I know he’s a serial killer. I know he is.” By the time I entered that room… When two people meet, if there is rapport, the person who is most certain will always influence the other person, and I was totally certain. They were trying to get revved up to certainty. Do you agree with this; yes or no? [audience says “Yes”]

Changing Mindset for Wealth

I’d do another one because I was poor. I had to change my mindset. I kept doing things, but I never got beyond it. I’d say, “God’s wealth is circulating in my life. His wealth flows to me, in avalanches of abundance. All my needs, desires and goals are met instantaneously by infinite intelligence. For I am one with God, and God is everything.” I would imagine the abundance in my life, and I would feel so grateful. A year later, I went from making $38,000 a year to making a million dollars a year, in one year.

Closing Remarks

Evan Carmichael: Thank you so much for watching. I made this video because Subash Limbu and my cameraman, Jason, asked me to. If there is a famous entrepreneur that you want me to profile next, leave it in the comments below, and I’ll see what I can do. I’d also love to know which of Tony Robbins’ top 10 rules was the most impactful on you. Leave it in the comments, and I’ll join the discussion. Thank you so much for watching. Continue to believe, and I’ll see you soon.

Bonus – Tony Robbins’ Advice

BONUS Tony Robbins: There’s a man named Ken Blanchard who wrote those books called The One Minute Manager books. He said something very early in my life. He said, “Tony,” he said, “A business will always consume whatever’s available.” And, he said, “I see you’re coming out with your first book.” I was 24, it was Unlimited Power, and he goes, “You’re coming out with this book, I think it’s going to be a big success. Do not put that money in your business. Take that money and put it into a separate investment account that nobody else touches. He said, I’m telling you the business will get all the benefit of all the media, of all the things that come to it, but the actual dollars of that should stay out.” He said the same thing when I had an infomercial. He said, “Take that money and put it aside.” Well, it was one of the best pieces of advice I’d ever gotten in my entire life because I put it aside and there were times when that money was needed. But, I was like putting it in a chapel, it was like putting it where it was sacred money and it was not going to be touched. If someone came along and said, “You have no money for your business, but guess what Obama just raised the taxes 20% more for your business.” You’d scream, you’d yell, you’d be upset and you’d pay it.

Prioritizing Family and Wealth

So, why not put your family first? Why not have a portion of what you own, or what you earn, I should say, for yours to keep. It doesn’t go to Kate Spade, it doesn’t go to Wall Street, it goes to your family. The way you do that is you tax yourself, it’s a wealth tax. You go, “That’s my freedom fund.” It comes off the top. The secret is automate it so you don’t see it, that’s really the most important thing. Very often you’re getting what you’re asking for, you’re just not aware of how general you’re asking. Clarity is power. The more clear you are about exactly what it is you want, the more your brain knows how to get there. Your brain is a servomechanism. It’s like a bomb. Those bombs, those missiles, they have a servomechanism, so if the target moves, it knows what the target is and it follows it.

Your brain, when you condition it, knows exactly what to go for and it will find a way to get there. Did you ever buy a certain outfit or a certain car and suddenly see that car or outfit everywhere? How many of you have had that experience? Say, “I”. How come that car or outfit is everywhere? It always was everywhere, but now you notice it and the reason is because there’s a part of your brain called the reticular activating system, the RAS. That part of your brain determines what you notice and what you don’t notice.

Your brain spends most of its time trying to make sure you don’t notice because you’ll go crazy if you notice everything. But, when you decide what’s most important to you, your brain goes after it. Everyone I know who’s successful builds what I call an RPM plan. RPM is built on the metaphor that the way to get from where you are to where you want to go the fastest is you’ve got to build power, like in a car, RPMs. The “R” stands for, they know the result in the rafters, they know what they want precisely. If you don’t know exactly what you want or if you let yourself get beyond that into something general, you’re not going to achieve it. Clarity is power.

You’ve got to know the specific result you’re after. What do you want? If you can’t answer that question right now in personal life, in your body, in your relationships, in your finances, in your spirituality, then you’re not going to be as fulfilled as you want to be. Here’s my assignment for you, if you want one. If you want to go from conversation to some action, here’s a simple thing to do. What’s an area in your life right now that you really want to improve? What’s an area that’s important to improve?

If you’re body’s great, how about your career? If your career’s great, how about your relationships? Intimate ones especially. Or, your kids. Or, your relationship with your creator, your spiritual side of your life. Or, is it your finances. Figure an area that really matters, decide on that area. Number One: Write down what your life is like in that area right now as specifically as possible. So, you might say, “Well I’m 13.5 pounds’ overweight. You know, whatever the weight is, whatever the situation is. Or, “My body fat’s like this” or “I wake up exhausted in the morning.”

And you write the truth of where you are right now, so you’re real clear. Or, I’m not in a relationship. I say I want a relationship, but I’m not in one. I don’t seem to find them; all the good ones seem to be gone is my belief. I really do want one, but I don’t have it. Whatever your definition is, “I’m in a relationship and God I wish I wasn’t in a relationship. I’m planning my escape.” Wherever you are. Or, “I have a wonderful relationship, we love each other, but there just isn’t enough passion.” Just write the truth of where you are.

The area you want to change, but write how it is. The Second Step is, and this is where you’ve got to be really honest with yourself, what are the rituals that have put there? Because, whatever results you’re getting, even if you don’t like the results, there are some rituals that are putting you in that place. There are some rituals of what you eat or don’t eat, how you move or don’t move, how you sleep or don’t sleep. There are some rituals in the lack of variety or spice or energy or focus in an area. There’s something you’re doing and it’s usually not one thing, it’s a bunch of little things that you kind of do consistently whenever you think about getting in a relationship.

Overcoming Overwhelm and Creating Rituals

whenever you think about working out, whenever you think about money, you get yourself into a state of overwhelm. You start thinking about all of the things you can’t control. Just write down all of the rituals you have.

Setting a Clear Vision

Here’s the Third Step: What do you want? What’s your vision? Be really specific. I want to be my fighting weight; I want to be the strongest I’ve ever felt. I want to be… I’m going to turn… whatever it is, be specific.

Establishing Rituals for Success

Last step Number Four: What are the rituals that will get you there? What would you need to do differently each morning if you were going be that kind of energy, that kind of strength? How often would you have to work out? What days would you work out? What time? A ritual is something you do consistently, usually at a specific time so it becomes automatic.

The Power of Starting Now

Let me tell you something, will power doesn’t last. But rituals can last a lifetime. I bet you have some rituals you have in your life that you’ve been doing for years, even though some of them don’t serve you. I’m just saying, wake yourself up. If you want a new year and a new life, you don’t have to start on January first, start today. Start with this little video. Just begin to see what happens and see how easy it is to just do a few little rituals.

Don’t do them all, just do two or three new things. You know what happens? You’ll get momentum, because once you discipline yourself in one area of your life, you feel yourself doing it in other areas as well. I always say something that my original teacher taught me, I always remind people; there’s always two pains in life, there’s the pain of discipline or there’s the pain of regret.

Discipline weighs ounces, as my friend Jim Rohn taught me, regret weighs tons. You don’t want to have regret. So, right now, what do you want to change, what’s it really like, what are the rituals that got you there? That will take a little homework. If you’re not sure, ask the people around you, they’ll tell you what your rituals are. What do I really want in depth, what are the rituals that will get me there and then get yourself to start a few of those actions and lock them in place.