Jordan Peterson – “Most People Learn This TOO LATE In Life”

Introduction

In this video, Dr. Jordan Peterson discusses the importance of viewing the world through a narrative or story and how it shapes our emotions and responses. He also touches on the cultural debate surrounding different narratives and their impact on society.

The Power of Story

Dr. Peterson emphasizes that we naturally see the world through a story, which helps us connect emotionally with others by adopting their goals. This emotional alignment allows us to understand and mimic their feelings.

Choosing the Right Story

The video raises the question of which story we should adopt to view the world. Dr. Peterson mentions that there is a cultural conflict between different narratives. Postmodernists and Marxists argue that all stories are fragmented and subjective, or they assert that the only story is one of power, domination, and victimization.

The Pathological Story of Domination

Dr. Peterson critiques the narrative that sees the world as a constant struggle for power and dominance. He describes it as a bleak and counterproductive view that justifies the use of power to deal with others. He also addresses the misconception that power equates to success by highlighting the example of brutal societies like North Korea.

Overall, the video touches on the significance of narratives in shaping our perception of the world and their role in societal debates and conflicts.

The Cost of Dominance

Dr. Peterson argues that achieving dominance through force can come at a great cost. He uses the example of Alexander Solzhenitsyn’s investigation into Joseph Stalin’s psychological state. Despite being the most powerful person in a corrupt country, Stalin had no true friends, only sycophants. He lived in constant distrust, contempt, and fear, which ultimately led to his likely murder. Dr. Peterson suggests that this outcome is not indicative of success.

The Negative Outcomes of Power-Based Strategies

Dr. Peterson further discusses the negative consequences of power-based strategies in various aspects of life. He advises against building marriages or friendships on power dynamics, as they lack reciprocity, mutuality, and genuine love and regard.

Successful Business Ethos

In the business world, Dr. Peterson points out that true success comes from making mutually beneficial contracts and offering genuine service and value to customers. These practices are not about exploitation or power but about creating an ethos based on cooperation and mutual benefit.

The Hero’s Journey

Dr. Peterson introduces the concept of the hero’s journey, a fundamental story archetype found in many cultures. He describes it as the story of confronting a transforming horizon of possibilities. The hero ventures outside the known city, faces a dragon (representing a predator), and overcomes it. The hero’s journey is about shaping possibilities with a vision and the courage to confront chaos and challenges.

In this part of the video, Dr. Peterson outlines the hero’s journey as a central theme in human mythology and storytelling, emphasizing the hero’s role in confronting chaos and bringing order to the world. This narrative archetype is prevalent in Western culture and is also found in various works of literature and film.

The Symbolism of the Hero’s Journey

Continuing his discussion on the hero’s journey, Dr. Peterson delves into the symbolism within this narrative archetype. He explains that dragons often hoard treasures, which represent what individuals most need to find. The idea is that the most important discoveries are hidden where people are least inclined to search.

The Hero’s Attractiveness

Dr. Peterson suggests that individuals who can confront chaos in a visionary manner and shape it into a habitable cosmos become highly attractive as partners. This attractiveness stems from the hero’s ability to bring order and stability to their surroundings, making them valuable in both personal and societal contexts.

The Oldest Written Story

Dr. Peterson references the Mesopotamian story called “The Enuma Elish,” where the hero Marduk confronts a dragon threatening the world. He mentions that this story archetype can be found in most adventure stories, with heroes facing either chaos or corrupt gigantism.

Christianity and the Crucifix

Dr. Peterson connects the hero’s journey to Christianity, particularly the crucifix. He describes the crucifix as a symbol of chaos and vulnerability, with the crucified Christ representing someone who voluntarily takes on the chaotic weight of existence. In the Christian story, Christ’s passion amalgamates all potential suffering and serves as a Redemptive symbol.

Preparing for Life’s Difficulties

Dr. Peterson emphasizes the importance of preparing for life’s difficulties by envisioning and fortifying oneself against potential adversities. This preparation can lead to increased resilience and a better ability to cope with stress, anxiety, pain, depression, and challenges when they arise.

In this portion of the video, Dr. Peterson explores the symbolic depth of the hero’s journey and its applications in personal development and resilience-building. He draws connections between the hero’s journey, Christianity, and the crucifix to illustrate the idea of confronting chaos and vulnerability voluntarily.

Confronting Life’s Challenges

Dr. Peterson encourages individuals to prepare for life’s difficulties rather than avoiding them. He argues that avoiding challenges leads to unpreparedness and a lack of resilience. By confronting potential adversities beforehand, individuals can strengthen their character and be better equipped to deal with life’s challenges when they arise.

Facing the Inevitable

He emphasizes that individuals should accept the inevitability of difficulties in their lives and not turn away from them. Turning away from challenges can lead to suffering, bitterness, and the distribution of that suffering to others. Dr. Peterson urges people to adopt a spirit of radical acceptance and even find moments of joy in facing life’s hardships.

Rejecting Hedonism and Dominance

Dr. Peterson criticizes hedonistic and power-focused orientations in life, arguing that they do not lead to personal or societal well-being. He dismisses the idea that subjective hedonism and power accumulation are viable strategies, highlighting the lack of evidence to support these approaches.

Imitating Christ and Confronting Evil

He brings Christianity into the discussion, stating that imitating Christ involves confronting the full range of vulnerable existence, including death, torture, and betrayal. He notes that suffering can be heightened when it is inflicted by malevolent individuals, which is a defining characteristic of evil. Dr. Peterson contends that acknowledging the existence of evil is crucial for resilience and hope.

Confronting Malevolence and Mortal Vulnerability

Dr. Peterson suggests that individuals should confront not only their mortality but also the existence of malevolence in the world. In the Christian story, Christ descends to the depths of Hell to face human malevolence. Similarly, individuals are morally obliged to confront malevolence to maximize resilience and foster hope.

In this part of the video, Dr. Peterson delves into the importance of confronting life’s challenges, preparing for adversity, and acknowledging the existence of evil. He underscores the idea that personal growth and resilience come from facing difficulties rather than avoiding them, even if it means confronting malevolence and the darkest aspects of human existence.

Encouraging Resilience and Truthfulness

Dr. Peterson responds to a question about how to protect children and loved ones in a world filled with challenges and the influence of social media and professors with different ideologies. He emphasizes that the key is to encourage individuals, like one’s own children, to pursue truth and develop resilience. He asserts that truth, when deeply reflective of reality, will ultimately prevail over lies and the unreal. Encouraging loved ones to live by and speak the truth is a powerful way to navigate the complexities of the world.

The Power of Truth

Dr. Peterson highlights the importance of having faith in the truth, even when it may lead to trouble or adversity. He suggests that when one tells the truth, whatever happens as a result is ultimately the best outcome. This perspective aligns with the idea that truth can create habitable order out of chaos, as seen in the opening sections of Genesis.

The Image of God and Truth-Telling

Dr. Peterson draws a connection between the creation of order from chaos in the biblical narrative and the human capacity to replicate this process by speaking the truth. He suggests that individuals, made in the image of God, have the ability to bring order into their lives and the world through truthful speech.

In this portion of the video, Dr. Peterson explores the power of truth and the role it plays in guiding individuals through the challenges of life. He emphasizes the importance of faith in the truth and encourages people to have confidence that living by and speaking the truth will ultimately lead to the best outcomes, even if it means facing short-term difficulties.

Rule Eight: “Tell the Truth – or at Least Don’t Lie”

In his response, Dr. Peterson delves into the importance of telling the truth and differentiates between knowing the complete truth and knowing the partial truth. He acknowledges that none of us have full access to all knowledge, and our understanding of truth is partial. However, he emphasizes the significance of recognizing the moments when we knowingly say something false or engage in actions that we know to be wrong.

Dr. Peterson suggests that individuals should start by stopping themselves from saying things they know to be false and refraining from doing things they know are wrong. This practice helps improve the precision of one’s speech and clarity of vision. He believes that over time, with diligent practice, people can become better at distinguishing between truth and falsehood.

The primary reason for striving to tell the truth, according to Dr. Peterson, is to prepare oneself for the moment when they have to make a critical decision. He emphasizes that in a crucial situation, one needs to rely on their ability to make the right choice. Practicing truthfulness ensures that when faced with a critical decision, a person can trust themselves to choose wisely.

Dr. Peterson concludes by warning against the consequences of not being prepared to make the right decision in a critical moment and highlights the importance of having a clear mind and sharp judgment when it matters most. He also mentions the detrimental impact of practicing dishonesty over time.

This part of the video explores the depth of Dr. Peterson’s perspective on truth and its significance in preparing individuals for important decisions in life. He encourages self-awareness and the development of character through the practice of truthfulness.

Truth and Lies

Truth in a way that enables them to manipulate towards an end, yeah, well, that’s that’s a particularly pathological form of lying. That’s actually using the Lord’s name in vain, by the way, you know, that famous commandment. You don’t use the Lord’s name in vain. That doesn’t mean to not swear; it means do not pretend to be serving God when you’re not. And that’s that kind of lie that you described.

Telling the truth is a very tricky issue because you have to be aiming up in all ways to ensure that what you’re relating isn’t manipulatively, manipulatively self-serving at some subtle level. And it takes a long time to orient yourself at a high enough level simultaneously so that you don’t, so that you’re no longer playing those sorts of games. But you do that by practicing. You do that by practicing not lying. It’s like, you know, you try to make that a vow, and you can clear yourself up an awful lot.

A lot of what you do with people in psychotherapy, a huge part of it is you help them disentangle themselves from the web of lies that they found themselves trapped within. Decades of lies sometimes, or multiple lifetimes even because you see, you know, you do see families from time to time that are so wrapped up in lies that it goes back, you know, three or four generations. It’s just lies non-stop at every possible level. And so all of that has to be sorted out, and you often are doing that working as a psychotherapist. You can do that with a sustained moral effort on your own behalf. I mean, I don’t know what you’re doing if you’re a religious practitioner and you go and confess. Is that you’re trying to remind yourself about what lies you’re telling, and you do that so that maybe you can stop doing it, and it’s a practice. You know, and you can get good at it. Where you practice.

So really, what the Dickens process is if you think about it, that we all do, right? People finding what the lies are that are holding them back and changing them right then and there with enough emotion. Question Mary, thank you, Dr. Peterson. Thanks, Tony and Sage.

De-Isolation and Chaos

Um, I’ve heard you say, Dr. Peterson, and what I love about these stories of mythology and biblical stories is I’ve heard you say it de-isolates us, and it gives us something that’s like, wow, I’m not alone. A lot of people feel this way. And, you know, hearing you explain this and sitting through some of the speakers that we’ve had earlier, I had the feeling that, wow, this world is continuing like the chaos keeps coming, and it feels overwhelming when I really think about the big picture of it sometimes in the complexity of it all and the things like I will never understand this, whether it’s financials or AI or all that the world is moving into the dynamics of countries. I’m shaking just talking about it. I’m wondering, my experience is almost like there’s these islands of order. I find that in my family. I find that in a safe community, mom and dad and friends. But it’s like, I don’t know if that’s a woman’s perspective of like, wow, there’s a lot going on out there, and I’m just trying to like cling to my people and something that I understand. Is that even a problem?

I think you’ve got it. No, no. I think you’ve got it right. I mean, first of all, it’s inevitably the case that what would you say you confronted an infinite expanse of ignorance in some fundamental way. Things are always going to be ultimately beyond you. You see that in the biblical stories that insist, for example, that people can only see the back of God. And so, an existential reality that there’s going to be more coming at you than you can manage and master. And then, of course, the question is, how do you deal with that? And you deal with that like I say, there deals with the ocean in a boat. You know, there’s a lot of ocean, but you can stay afloat, and you can navigate forward.

So then you might ask, well, how do you do that? Well, we talked about that a little bit today in terms of orienting stories. You know, you have to put forward some courage and some faith, and you have to confront the things that are obstacles in your path. And that attitude helps turn you into something that’s united psychologically, right, that can strengthen you personally. But then there’s the social element to that because if we share the same story that we should confront chaos and make order, and we do that together, then now we have social unity around us, and that means that we have the strength of numbers. No part of the reason that I’ve been able to maneuver through the political turmoil that I’d be admired in is because I have a great family. They’re very supportive, and I have a lot of friends who are tough people, and they were behind me, and I have a broader social community, and that fortifies me. And that’s the kind of unity in numbers and in belief that does help you maintain your integrated spirit through the chaos of life. That’s not weakness; that’s a necessary observation that part of your sanity depends on your proper, the proper harmony you established with a social community.

Now, the female part of that might be that the female locus of concentration is more local, right, and that and more familial. But that’s not a bad thing. Someone has to bind the damn families together, and to some degree, we’re islands unto ourselves, but to some degree were all members of family first and then community second. And it…

Responsibility and Passion

Family first and then Community second, and it’s not inappropriate at all to make the family level of social integration a fundamental point of concern. And I do think that’s the natural resting place of women, partly because they have to take care of infants, young children, and that’s not a weakness; it’s just a difference of approach. It’s nothing to be ashamed of, and it’s a virtue. Now, it does mean that we still have to face the complex problem of how you integrate the integrated family in the broader community, and I would say that’s a more masculine problem. Now that doesn’t mean men and women can’t address the same damn problem, but all things being equal, there’s still a different level of natural concern. None of that’s reason to feel guilty.

When I counsel women, for example, on their career development, I say, “Well, look, you know, once you have a child, your fundamental concern should be your child, and that’s true whether you’re a father or a mother. But it’s particularly true if you’re a mother, especially if you have an infant.” Men and women will say, “Well, what do I do about my career? You know, I feel guilty because I’m not pursuing my career, or I feel guilty when I’m pursuing my career that I’m not attending to my child.” Women could be screwed both ways on that matter. I would say, “Well, look, it’s perfectly reasonable for you to model successful adaptations of the broader social community for your kids. You know, you have to get your act together; you have to get your family together. Then you have to integrate you and your family in the broader community; you should be serving all of that simultaneously. That’s about all that’s a virtue.” And I, you know, women might approach that family first and Rogers’s social world second, and maybe men the other way around. No, it’s a blues rule of thumb, but both of those approaches can work just fine and they work great in tandem. Beautiful.

One more, Dr. Peterson. Thank you. I was, uh, the question I have for you is there’s a lot of chaos in the world, and I sometimes wonder what or maybe have a hard time deciding what part of the chaos am I responsible for uniquely confronting. So Tony’s very passionate about ending hunger, for example, with their billions of meals, and I have kind of racked my brain over time and not found that same kind of passion for a particular, you know, cause like that. And I wonder how might a person make that choice.

That’s a great question. Well, I’ll tell you a little story first; it’s worthwhile knowing. So it’s a story from Mexico; it’s the story of the burning bush, which is kind of a mysterious story. And so here’s how that story essentially goes. So Moses is trying to find his way, right? He’s trying to identify his path. And he’s off wandering down a pathway, minding his own business one day, and something attracts his attention. It sort of glitters and glimmers off to the side, and it pulls him towards it. Now, he has to decide to step off the path and go investigate. The story makes that quite clear. And this is a burning bush, not a burning forest; it’s not so overwhelming that you can’t avoid it, alright? And so Moses goes and decides he’s going to investigate this thing that captures his interest, and as he gets closer to it, he starts to hear a divine voice.

The first thing the voice tells him as he gets closer is that he’s on sacred ground and that he should take off his shoes, and then he starts to interact with this strange phenomenon, this burning bush, and God himself reveals his name to Moses. So what does that mean? Well, here’s one thing it means: lots of things grip our interests, and not really of our own accord; you can’t really pick what you’re interested in; it picks you. Now, you can pick whether or not you pursue it or not, and you could predict how diligently you pursue it, but the interest itself manifests itself in a kind of autonomous manner. Now, you might ask yourself, well, what would happen if you really pursued what gripped your interest, and the answer is, well, you get deeper and deeper into it, and the deeper you get into something, the more you’re beginning to tread on sacred ground because there’s no difference between sacred and deep; it’s the same idea.

And the idea in the burning bush story is that if you attend to what compels your interest with enough diligence, the nature of being itself will reveal itself to you, and that’s true. So you might say, well, how does that burning bush appear then in the confines of normal life, and I would say it appears in two ways: it appears in the guise of what interests you, and it appears in the guise of what sets itself before you as a problem.

Seeking a Vision

“Do this over a couple of days, write down what bothers you. You know there’s going to be things about life, about the current political situation, about the details of your personal life, your relationships with other people that bother you. Now, a million things could bother you, and some things do; those are your problems, and your destiny is in your problems.

And then I would also say, well, watch yourself for a couple of weeks and see what you’re doing when what you’re doing appears meaningful, right when your interest is gripped and you’re compelled. Because when you’re in the place where you are when your interest is compelled, then you’re where you should be. And one of the things you want to learn is how to be there more. You have to kind of treat yourself like a stranger to figure that out because, well, as you said, you know you haven’t been able to find your path precisely. Well, that means you don’t know who the hell you are. Well, that’s what it means fundamentally. You may know some things about yourself, but you don’t know yourself as deeply as you might. You have to understand that there’s a certain degree of arbitrary strangeness about you and about the things that will compel you, and you need to discover what those are, and paying attention can help. It’s like, ‘Where am I when I think I’m where I should be, and what am I doing?’ And you can ask yourself that over a two-week period or a one-month period, like you’re asking someone you don’t know.

Then the other thing I would recommend more concretely is I have this program called Future Authoring on a website called self-authoring.com. And what the Future Authoring program helps you do is to develop a comprehensive vision. And it’s a great thing, by the way, to have your employees do if you run a company; it’ll make them much more productive and also more psychologically integrated. The way that this program works is that it asks you, this is a good meditative exercise, I suppose it’s a form of prayer. Imagine now you’re imagining five years from now, and I literally mean imagine this, okay? Imagine five years from now. Here’s the deal: you could have what you want and you need, and you could be who you want to be, but you have to figure out what that is; that’s the price you have to pay. So now you have to fantasize. It’s like, okay, if I was who I would want to be, and if I had what I needed that I wanted, what would that look like? Write it down for 15 minutes; you’re not going to get it right, just sketch it out. And then you can do the opposite, which is, alright, now, if I let my bad habits and inadequacies have the upper hand and order me, in what sort of hell could I occupy in five years? That’s useful to know too because that’s a good way of specifying where you don’t want to go. The first part of the exercise helps you specify where you do want to go, the second part helps you specify where you don’t want to go. Then you have something to run away from and something to run toward, and that’s good for maximizing motivation.

And then the rest of the exercise helps people strategize. So you might say, well, I don’t exactly know who I want to be or where I want to be or what I want, and I would say, well, here’s some hints: if your intimate relationship were what you wanted, what would it look like? If your friendships were constructed the way you wanted them to be, what would that look like? These are questions you have to ask yourself. What would it look like if you were educated to the limits of your intelligence? What educational strategy would you have to pursue? What job or career would you want or need if you could have what you wanted or needed? How should you use your time outside of work? How would you take care of yourself mentally and physically? What services might you render to your family and your community if you could do it in the manner you wanted? These seven different questions to sort of differentiate your life. Man, it’s worth spending a few days figuring that out. We did that with university students before they went to university, and it dropped their dropout rate 50%, 90 minutes of writing dropped their dropout rate 50% and raised their grade point average 35%. So you need a vision, man. You need a vision. And you can develop a vision by pursuing what’s interesting to you; you can develop a vision by taking the problems that beset you seriously, and you can develop a vision by working with yourself to develop a vision.

Let’s say you love someone, maybe you have a friend who maybe it’s your wife, maybe a child, and you really love this person, and you say to them, ‘I really like to know what you want, you know, and knowing that maybe I can figure out how to help you if you would let me know.’ You can ask yourself the same damn question. Imagine that you dared to assume that you were worth attending to and that it would be okay if things worked out optimally for you in the best possible way. Just imagine for a moment that that was okay. Well, then you could ask yourself, well, alright, what would that look like? That’s an unbelievably useful exercise. So that’s a prayer, man, that’s a prayer fundamentally. And a prayer that’s devoted towards the seeking of a revelation.”

Jordan, go right on the time. I know you have tight time, and we’re down to the last minute. We just want to thank you for being a very answered prayer for so many of us in the world by your example of love and of integrity and of joy. Please give it up for Jordan, ladies and gentlemen. Jordan, it’s Sage; we just wanted to say thank you. It’s such an honor to have you here, and thank you for your sincerity, thank you for your goodness, thank you for your brilliant mind, your generous heart, and for shedding illumination on this beautiful path called human life. You’re doing it so beautifully. Love to you and Tammy, and God bless. We love you. See you soon. Thank you.